g for grinder

-kid cudi.

moved back to this city when i was still trying to figure her out. 2+ years later. really dont know how much farther i've got in the quest for womanly wisdom. progress, yes. but when it all boils down to it. are we there yet? spent the greater part of it lost. but in it all, i've found something more. and take that and continue this. gypsy dreams. as a child we moved often. never too long for any real memories. stories. trueblues. and then we came here. have a love/hate with this place. long enough for. memories. stories. blues. long enough to long to go. the itch. as she's become - she recognizes that time. the yearn. see what else the world holds and has for her. this time i was open. little by little. comfortable. which makes it hard. as if it would be easy. had a plan. used to say whats your plan? as long as you have that. make every day count.

so whats my plan?

september in new york?

the new york television festival is seeking volunteers. how excited are we? after my experience at the american black film festival last month i am pumped to get involved with everything. no time to waste for the aspiring. the festival dates september 21-26. was hoping october in new york for the birthday. but now......

more information and volunteer application available @ www.nytvf.com

diy / thats a bad a shoe

@littersf

naomisdiaries

reposted.

randomly posting because for my blog to grow...i must post. blogcruisin' and came across the following, both of which pertain to exactly where my thought process is today. kinda who and where i am right now. so heres a share. enjoy.

modelliberation.blogspot.com
model nikkia [who i've been following. ♥her.]
from her post "in a funk"

Then there are the conversations in which I try unsuccessfully to explain to people that I'm not trying to be famous. I just want to work. The bottom line is: if I don't work, I can't live. This industry requires self promotion. Sure, I think it's a little weird when a stranger knows my name. But if that stranger recognizes me from great work I've done, I'm all for it.

I wake up every morning and have to ask myself why I am still doing this. There are thousands of other women/girls that have similar looks to mine, so why am I still in the game?I must have purpose, right? Answer: God put me here. And that's all I need.

my sentiments exactly...

verysmartbrothas.com [dont you ♥ the name?]
from their post "im still black: 7 things i learned while watching cnn's black in america

6) Getting into college can be a very emotional moment for some people.

Much like many other people like me, I took getting into college for granted. I mean hell, for me it wasn’t ‘will I get into college?’, it was which college won’t I get accepted to and where am I going. It was a very privileged standpoint I was in. To see the young lady from CT cry at getting accepted into a college I’d never heard of was kind of humbling for me. Just one of those things I realize it’s easy to take for granted when I didn’t have to struggle for my whole life. That was a moment I was pretty glad to have seen: somebody who’s been through hell finally see some light at the other end.

7) Despite being exactly who’s apart of the group, I’ll never be apart of the upper-echelon Black America circle (piggybacking off of number 4).

Save being Greek, I’m the type of guy who’d be in the Jack and Jill’s and would be apart of the book Our Kind of People (one of the most eye opening books of my life, then again, I never even heard of Jack & Jill, Boule, Links, etc until I got to college), except I never will be because until I got to college, nobody I knew was apart of that world. It’s a weird feeling realizing that en entire Black population of people just like you exists…without you. Very weird dichotomy.

didnt realize i took college for granted. but times like today. when im dreading the return of the semester, doubting myself, doubting whether or not i want to finish school. [blasphemy!...i know-all kindsa issues these days] made me think about a family member who never graduated h/s yet came from the same household with someone who has a masters and another a doctorate. and what her children see their future as. opposed to my own. dont take anything for granted. ever. walking across that stage will be one of the best....[even if it did take forever :>]

act black

compelled to post. sure these kgb folks didnt mean any harm. is it stereotypical? yes. moreso, we need to ask though. why?
as for the 'yak' portion? stopit.

bush vs.bush

caught myself laughing out loud at this one. comedian steve bridges with our former president at white house dinner. funny how this was in 06 and never came across it.

better clip here.

if 09 is when im a see mine

-drake.
he called it didnt he? hence the title of my last post. going to keep that tactic in effect. speak it.. this isnt about drake though. not this time. sharing todays music find with. here is what we came up with. jay's we run this town. feat rihanna and kanye. and yes im pretty sure the drake track [off that?] is still coming. or is out there? he wasnt kicked off though. just dont think it has leaked. yet. and liking this chrisette michele and wale fragile.
music purchases*: laura izibor's album. maxwell's new. still havent gotten it. and the new discovery- katie melua.

jay z feat rihanna and kanye west. run this town
run this town

chrisette michele feat wale.
fragile

click on song title
*purchases. means worth bypassing the download and going old school. actually buying the cd.

via h.e.r & thf

twothousandtwelve

ive just spent the last 30 mins distracted [happens too often] over at kid cudi's website. [kidcudi.com] man thats a cool kid. going through my essie'smusic folder i have higher up, respect my conglomerate, daynnight, sky might fall and the poke her face remix from way bck...and now floatin in sky. still havent listened to that last track though. didnt realize how much i listened to him but didnt know who this kid was. pretty.nice. drke better stop making me mad....

distant on the 'blogging' lately. not as if i have a following. yet. hopeful. maybe those myspace people will venture ovr. still in the feefifofum mindframe. like why the blog again? have to find my niche. i suppose. think why previous dabs at this were semisuccesful was that i didnt even do it really to blog per say. was bored and had life angst and was candidly candid and probably too open and honest. but according to counters it struck something. so maybe thats it. dont know. have a few true passions which i can share. [dramadramadrama] and my daily perusings which i feel others might like. [fashion.style.music] and of course my obsession with hair which could help girls everywhere. know when i was looking for blck girl blogs [and still do] there is really littletonone for this specific genre. was going to be my story. but. my story will be a story. one day. right now its a prologue. and chapter 1 starts off slow. no rush though. in due time. i can wait my turn. [though i do feel like i am getting old. yes at 23. where is my agent all ready?] do know that nothing will come sitting and waiting for it. the abff was the best thing that could have happened to me at this time. like being rebaptized. [wow.whatananology.] but really. i came alive again. remembered where i wanted to be. tasted my dream again. He does that me. gives me little signs here and there. tastes i call it. reminds me. so sooner than later. thank me later. hate me now love me later. all of that. excited.

not sure where this rant really came from. was supposed to be talking about music. havent been able to find much online intriguing but...thats for the next post....

prn*

prn*: hairporn. a bhm thing. hair for the obsessed.
specs: wagmans vs. straightened. flat ironed curled. no product. natural hair

dirtyboys

the other toira loves her tunes. for "punishment" my mom used to take away the radio. for weeks. the horror. i essie'd [putonmp3playertoplayincar] this song a while back. looks like they made a video. originally was intrigued by cudi's play with gaga's lyrics. and of course cudi in general. i also like how this wasn't kanye directed. i heart drake. but you do notice how best i ever had still has not premiered on toirajames. it wasnt even my favorite song. i mean i understand marketing. you gottadowhatugottado. but really? i even got the concept. but the video as a whole. -minus the cinematography-two thumbs down. i digress. i make ya say. ooh ohh...

what do you think

received a question on what i thought about the following comments; [howniceofutoask]
In the July issue of UK's Pride magazine, a question referring to Beyonce's latest role was asked.
Here is actress Nia Long's reply

I didn’t see ‘Obsessed,’ so I can’t comment, but it’s just not about how talented you are anymore. It’s about, ‘How much box-office revenue will this person generate?’ When you see certain people – we won’t name names – they just don’t have the skill, and no one in their team has said, ‘You need acting classes,’”

She continues with, “If you’re a singer not an actress, you should sing. If you’re a rapper, you should rap,” “If you take time to develop your craft, God bless you. Jamie Foxx is an example of both [actor and singer].”

“If you were able to take all the Black actresses and the choices we’ve made collectively, it’s a pure reflection of what you see on film. People need to work. But the content? The opportunities for Black actresses are more widespread today, but the quality has suffered.”

What do I think? you want my humble opinion. hm. i did a little write up on a myspace blog [yes. laughoutloud] about this very same thing. irks me. like pet peeve number one people using art it seems. understand all the number games and marketing appeal but there comes a point when it is belittling the craft. i cant think of any other word. or way to put it. its mocking to the fine artists who study and love this craft to see someone painfully work their way through a scene just because they might be rated high on some nielsen report. ? i mean that movie didnt do that well. im with nia-i didnt see it and probably wont anytime soon, so i cant comment directly. someone told me she was good. i digress. it isnt about beyonce though. or ashanti. or the actors/personalities receiving model contracts and landing the fashion covers. at the end of the day its a quick buck. and as an actress, or budding [like to think i am one, but to quote shelah, theres a long line between here and there] - you just have to work hard, continue to study your craft, your art, and prepare. because when it is your time. your season. you will shine.

[photo:Pridemagazine, content:ybf/theinsider]

fe.fi.fo.fum.

me and isis. a grand ole' time

im mad bored with this little weblog of mine. something just isnt right. lacks focus among other things. went to bed thinking of layouts and costumes. fell asleep. gonna wrk on this bk sonics french toast that just dropped in. via the boy. then to being creative and such. my brain just doesnt work like it used to.....

twinkle twinkle

daniel swarovski 20th anniversary couture collection.
swarovski.com

bum.mer

iwanttorollaroundinkarlascloset.











sawthesetwice.andtheystillareridiculous.inagoodway
julie.finsk.
stylebubble/shoelust

what 'tribal-inspired' should look like
ysl "AFRICAN" beaded dress. circa s/s1967
theluxirare
[theluxiRare is inspired. see the above link.]


shesbad.
jourdandunn. for louisvuitton.

call back

when it was just another audition. perks of the DVDs are the screentests they sometimes include. kind of nice seeing some of your favorite film actors [and the next up and comings] bared down just trying to land the role. making choices. inner dialogue. used to think it was just me. but after seeing this on another theatre blog. fellow actors unite.
where are all the drama blogs?

better link

precious.

this story is raw. no chaser. the kind of stuff you want films to be made of. best known for her comedic skills, mo'nique is the emotionally and physically abusive mother of clarieece 'precious' jones, [gadbourey sidibe] a teenage girl pregnant for the second time by her father. pause. this is their story. Precious, is a film based on the novel, push by sapphire and directed by lee daniels. the cast includes paula patton, lenny kravitz, sherri shepard and mariah carey, [who i hear gives a surprise performance]. remember reading about this when it was filming, & fast forward and i am sitting down with a producer for tyler perry studios and i hear the name again. [how life happens!] had to ask about newcomer gabbie [wheredidthisstarcomefrom?] and well- she just auditioned. [best ? you could think of toira] 3rd times a charm- saw the trailer and am compelled to share and pass along. this film has received great pre-generated buzz after receiving numerous awards and acclaim at the sundance film festival. with the strong acting and the poignant story delivered by daniels, there is oscar season talks as well. seriously am looking forward to seeing this in the theatres [with full audiences.] it is expected to release november 6 [ny, la. boo] so lets make it a movie night. and all go support our casts and studio.

www.weareallprecious.com
mr. bobb. toira j would love to attend a screening.

here's to the crazy ones....

seemed befitting for the moment.

...its because i dream.

my boy jimmy

jimmy choo. for h&m. that is. if youve been following the fashion blogs as i have for the past boring rainy week. then you allreadyknow about the morning of november 14. unfortunately there is not a single h&m in my neck of the woods. how sad i know. once and only once have i ventured into the little piece of heaven. and it happened to be in nycity. you know i savored every single three story morsel. by november, i plan to have figured out how to partake in the extravaganza.

cruise.

geesh
there are some art-eests from another era among us. so beautiful in their creativity.
these stylistas who make magic with their fabric and colors and sky high stilettos. reminds me of little me. when i had an imagination and would cut up clothes, wear things backwards. wrapping yards of fabric making 'couture dresses'. what happened? having a ball discovering these little hideouts of girly paradise. rumi@ fashiontoast, rebecca@clotheshorse. fashionpaths. suzy@stylebubble. and how could i ever forget the glamourai. i am in love. truly deeply madly. now that i consider myself a fashionista by any means. please. still trying to figure out how not to live in denim. i♥myjeans. but it has opened up my box and given me that 'little me' inspiration for coloring outside the lines. have i said i love? and now. we play dress up in the closet.

*skirt.bcbg; belt.gift/[think lucky]; zipper corset. silence&noise; shoes[not pictured]. urban o?

paynomindtome. see the blogroll.

door creaks open.

ill admit i wasnt quite that creative in the first post. see, this blg and i all ready have a love/hate relationship. being a fairly new follower of countless blogs in this netosphere [hello blogroll] and pondering over the idea of starting my own for quite some time i knew eventually both world would collide. back when myspace was cool, i so called myself 'blogging' over there to ease the high school angst. much too personal but ah the times. but with the arise of twitter and the ugh of myspace here i go again. just dont quit huh? cantstopwontstop
clearly have much too much time on my hands. and do i like awkardly putting myself out there? slightly wary of this world. its so quite....open. i mean really. like once its out there.... but i like to think im growing out of my awkardly insecure phase and this will be a step in not really discovering myself, but accepting all of my quirkisms. [though that is exactly what i just described to katie?] :> because i like to think im interesting, im sure ill peek in every so often. moreoftenthatnot-my passions. my pasttimes. things i like to share. and whatever else i can sneak in.
love/hate thing. see i didnt just want to make a blog. i wanted to start off with a movement. ?. didnt want a template, wanted a custom layout but my html/nowxml lacks far more than i evr imagined. samhelp and photoshop? 8 yr olds r bettr thn me. and then i've been stuck on a name forever. it will prob change before its all done and over with. the header is designed by friend illustrator samantharomage.com. one thing went right. and the subject itself. sigh. i've just decided it'll be an eclectic mix of whatever is in my head @ the moment. i will warn you. im a 'drama kid'. the boy says that explains it all. i am obsessed with hair. slightly addicted.these fashion bloggin girls have me playing dress up again. blame rumi over@ fashiontoast. and jakandjil. ugh. i pretty much think im awesome. when i wanna be. this blog will follow my journey, basically from here to the [critically acclaimed, powerful performance, highly respected, next it girl, entrepeneur, forbes listed, successful working actress] . shall we....?

first.

who is toira dee?
and y do i g.a.?