22.

while im at it. just had a birthday. yesterday. whowouldathunkit. and to think i used to do a countdown. insert age-and a half. decided im 22. thinks its funny ive allready stopped the clock. one of these days. now relishing in the fact that a] i was mistaken for 16 recently b] i have issues with my age.life. status in life. and well a basket of other ish. so until i break out of this black hole, 22 it is. makes for a better title too. thats another story. rambling. stop now if you wish. getting distracted watching this crazy a movie about a teenage girl recruiting her bf to kill the stepdad. def think i read this story somewhere in the news but this mess is crazy. electric knife and all. wow. the birthday. the most memorable? that spot is reserved for the age ten. surprises inside. hello kitty. makeup and nails. all pink everything. always put extremely high expectations on birthdays, holidays, proms. why cant i be a normal child, usually results in finding myself morose and blue. someone said i need 'happy pills'. how sad. especially for the girl who has permanent smile lines. whereshego? anyhoo. new age. place. outlook. dont feel nearly as old as the birth certificate says. the last few years have been a blur. left school. went back. came home. moved in with him. time. and now here we are. mom called it the 'sabbatical'. feeling good [for lack of a better word] these days though. not the best but better. every day im rediscovering myself. discovering my world. life is good. look around and realize no complaints. could be anywhere right now but im surrounded by my family, and love. and isnt that what its all about anyway. the good stuff.